WRITE ON: From Annette To Britney!

By PETER S. FERRARA<br>Record Columnist

Sat, May 17 2008

— The first thing I noticed about former “Mouseketeer” Annette Funicello was that she had no eyebrows. A carefully shaped black line had been drawn above each eye. It’s funny what you remember. This was some time back in the late 1970’s or early 1980’s. I was a “reporter” for a show Ted Turner was trying to get off the ground called “Good News.”
Media pioneer Ted had become sickened by all the violence and sex and mayhem which had taken over television programming. So the man who invented the “Satellite Superstation” concept and the “CNN Network” with its 24/7 news cycle decided to create an alternative kind of magazine show. He thought viewers might tune in to “feel-good” stories about people who were doing good deeds or looking back on folks who had done something positive in the past. I suggested a “piece” on everybody’s favorite member of the original “Mickey Mouse Club”—Annette. Turner said: “Go ahead.”
From my home in Santa Monica, California, I drove up U.S. Route 405—the San Diego Freeway—to the “Moraga Drive” exit near the top of the hill you must cross to get from West Hollywood to the San Fernando Valley. In a house quite humble by Hollywood standards, I found Annette all by herself.
I think it was near the end of her marriage to real estate businessman Jack Gilardi. In any event, the house was a far cry from the mansions of the rich and famous I had visited in Beverly Hills, Malibu and Bel Air.
Annette had her original “Mousekateer Ears” inside a glass case in the middle of a table in her living room. She was beginning to show the symptoms of Multiple Sclerosis that would sadly influence the rest of her life.
During the interview, she talked about how she came to audition in front of Walt Disney, who personally supervised many of the details of “The Mickey Mouse Club” when the show began in 1955. She told me that later in her career, Disney agreed to “loan” her out to a film studio which wanted her to star in a series of “Beach Party” movies she would make with teen idol Frankie Avalon.
When Walt Disney learned that the producers of these movies wanted Annette to wear a skimpy bikini, he said “Absolutely not,” and demanded she wear a more modest, one-piece bathing suit. Sex and sensationalism wasn’t Walt’s “bag,” and he would not let Annette appear in anything that ran against the wholesome image he wanted his Mouseketeers to project. It all seems so long ago, so quaint, this idea of being careful about not showing too much skin or suggestive behavior. All of the original Mouseketeers, from little “Cubby” O’Brien to the rapidly-maturing Annette, were molded to be clean and wholesome.
Annette has had more than her share of troubles. Folks outside show biz often think that television and film stars must lead glamorous and pain-free private lives because they always seem to be smiling and happy as well as beautiful and talented. The sad truth is that stars suffer the “slings and arrows” of life right along with the rest of us. A whole genre of tabloid “newspapers” now feeds on their misery.
American “culture” has declined dramatically during the time from when Annette was a Mouseketeer in 1955 to the age of more “modern” Mouseketeers like Christina Aguilera, Justin Timberlake, and Britney Spears. There never was any “sex” or violence on the old Mickey Mouse Club. It was almost an embarrass-ment that Annette was changing physically into a mature woman right before our eyes. But the crotch-grabbing, super-suggestive dancing antics of Britney and Justin would have been unthinkable back in 1955. I’m sure Walt Disney would be spinning in his grave if he had been buried. He wasn’t buried, of course. Instead, his body was frozen cryogenically to be thawed out later in the hopes of being “brought back to life.” “Fantasyland” lives, I guess.
All this current sleaze and splatter came home to me as I channel-surfed my way through television fare the other night. Show after show had people shooting, stabbing, raping, and beating on each other. All the jokes on the sitcom’s seemed to center on sex or the toilet. Most disturbing of all were the shows made for and starring children which seemed to treat kids as little more than tiny adults. There is something really sick about this Jon Benet Ramsey fixation we seem to have which exploits sexuality in children who should be playing with dolls or tossing frisbee’s instead of dating, striking sexy poses, or romancing each other. Don’t we want children to have innocent childhoods anymore?
Thank God for Public Television. I think if I had young kids in the house today I would limit what they can watch to PBS stations like our own KET here in Kentucky. At least on KET, I know that kids will see wholesome, educational, and interesting programming designed to encourage the wonder and curiosity we hope all our children develop.
•••

With all of that in mind, I want to send a heartfelt thank-you to Dr. Jerry Burgess for the delightful magic show he put on for local children at the McCreary County Library recently. As a former amateur magician myself,
I was spellbound by the grace and artistry Jerry demonstrated. He held a very young audience of kids in the palm of his hand as he raced through an exciting and highly-skilled magical routine. Hats off to you, Jerry.
By the same token, I want to praise all the volunteers who devoted a morning to reading youngsters books written by the immortal “Dr. Seuss” over at the Pine Knot Primary School last week. Principal Eugenia Jones and her staff did a tremendous job in organizing this “Read Out” event.
I also want to praise Kay Morrow and her library staff for the endless hours of work they put in to make our library a vibrant alternative to the mess mainstream American culture has become.
It is only through the efforts of these good people and others like them that we can hope to give our kids a chance at being just kids again—not the miniature adults mainstream media thinks children should be.
•
Copyright 2008 Peter Ferrara

Copyright © 1999-2008 cnhi, inc.